UVa students updating guide to civility

George Washington wrote down this rule to guide his behavior: “Undertake not to Teach your equal in the art himself Proffesses; it Savours of arrogancy.”
“Nate from UVa” wrote this one: “If you can clearly understand someone’s post or chat online, don’t critique their grammar or spelling just because you have nothing of substance to say. Typos happen.”

Nate’s rule is among hundreds of submissions to the University of Virginia’s Civility Project, a student effort to create a 21st-century version of the first president’s personal guide to propriety.
The students have the help of Miss Manners herself as they revise Washington’s “Copy of Rules of Civility & Decent Behaviour In Company and Conversation.”
It’s a timely project for uncivil times, with so many recent highly publicized outbursts on Capitol Hill and beyond. But Miss Manners columnist Judith Martin thinks people are growing tired of all the rudeness and contention around them.
“ ‘Civility’ is no longer a humorous or ridiculous or snobbish word,” said Martin, who met recently with students who are working on the project. “It’s something
that people long for, almost to the extent of being willing to behave civilly themselves — not quite, but almost.”

That’s a trend that Erica B. Mitchell, the student leader of the project, has noticed in the ideas for new rules that she has seen. Many suggestions include frequently breached rules on cell-phone etiquette, for example.
“People are doing it, but they see that it is wrong,” said Mitchell, a fourth-year history major from Southwest Virginia.
Mitchell is one of about 25 students on the Civility Project committee who are working with the staff of the Papers of George Washington, based at UVa.
When he was about 16, Washington copied 110 rules of civility that dated to a 17th-century Jesuit college in France. Not much is known about why Washin-gton chose the rules he copied, said Theodore J. Crackel, editor-in-chief of the Papers of George Washington.
But Washington is thought to have reflected on the rules as a means to maintain self-control, Crackel said. He also viewed them as a guide to acceptable behavior for the type of “society that he wanted to be part of.”
Martin told the students their new rules should serve a similar purpose.

“This is deep, deep in the American ethos that anybody can rise,” she said. And with that mobility comes the question, “If I get ahead, how am I going to fit in?”
The students have been gathering suggestions on a Web site created by committee member Helen Ye, a fourth-year economics major from Northern Virginia.
Some have a nod to technology — “If you would not say something to someone’s face, do not say it over the Internet” — but still don’t stray far from Washington’s intent: “Speak not Evil of the absent for it is unjust.”
Others, like admonitions about spitting into a fire, might not be a relevant rule for today.

The committee is soliciting ideas from students at other universities through the Web site and also holding events at UVa.
The goal is to complete the project by December and publish the revised rules in a pamphlet, which will include an essay by Martin.
Part of the challenge for students is to reflect the diversity that was not present in Washington’s day. Making eye contact during conversation, for example, can be viewed as disrespectful among Asian people, one committee member noted.